We went to the doctor today and saw a different doctor within the same practice. She was very nice and compassionate! The baby's heartbeat is still strong and the baby was moving like crazy. The doctor and ultrasound tech were surprised at how active this baby is. Unfortunately, there haven't been any changes with the baby's kidneys or amniotic fluid. The big shock today was when the doctor informed us that since there isn't much room in the placenta without the fluid, the baby will probably end up laying on the umbilical cord causing it to die. The average gestation for babies with this problem is about 24-26 weeks, which means I may only have a few more weeks in this pregnancy. This is hard for Rob and me to grasp...we thought we had at least another 10 or 12 weeks, which we might, but it's not typical. It feels so abrupt. So sudden. So...not what we anticipated. :( We go back next week for another ultrasound to make sure the baby's still alive. Hopefully, we don't have anymore super shocks for a couple of weeks.
Please continue to pray for the miracle of our Junebug's kidneys working and amniotic fluid filling the placenta. Please pray for our families...pray that God gives them peace, strength, and understanding. This is just as tough on them as it is on us. Pray for our friends...they have been with us through this (which we love and appreciate), but we will continue to lean on them for support. Please pray that God continues to give us peace and strength throughout this journey. We know that this is God's plan, but each time we get new not-good news...it wears on us emotionally, mentally, and physically. Pray that God gives us guidance and wisdom over the next several weeks with decisions that will need to be made and handled.
To our Junebug:
You are one active, determined, little bug. We could see you today, moving your little booty around. It was so cute! You are a blessing to us and those around us. God has sent you to change the world, and you have! You have made big changes in people...people Mommy and Daddy know and don't know. We (along with many other people) pray for you many times everyday. We would love to meet you, but just not yet! Stay in there where it's warm and safe for a little bit longer. We love you, Bug!
Momma and Daddy
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer. 29:11)
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Week 19
We are at the end of week 19, so I'm going to reflect on this week.
We went to the specialist on Monday (Jan. 24) for an ultrasound to see if anything has changed in the baby's kidneys or amount of fluid. There really hadn't been any change that we and the doctor could tell, so we go back on Monday (Jan. 31) for another look. I was really disappointed to hear the doctor say that everything looked the same. I went into the appointment really hopeful (maybe too hopeful) that there would be fluid and the baby's kidneys would be working (even just one). So needless to say, I was upset when we left the hospital. I (like everyone else) had been praying constantly for God to work on our Junebug's kidneys...make them work...make there be fluid. And when there is no change, I asked God why He isn't anwering our prayers! Come on, God! You created this life...why are you doing this!?!
Well, my wonderful sis-in-love (Rett) wrote a beautiful post on their blog...and I think it helped answer my questions. :) Read it here...then come back to finish reading my post. :)
After I read it, the rest of this week has been pretty good. I just keep telling myself that maybe God's reason is ultimately for His glory. Our little Junebug, living in my body, is changing people...for the better!! People are talking to Him that haven't talked to Him in a while...or ever! Junebug is changing relationships with people...co-workers, friends, strangers, family...this baby is making people care about each other. Taking time out of their busy lives to talk to people and talk to God. God definitely has big plans for this little baby that has about 20 weeks to hang out inside of me.
Yesterday, on the way home from school/work, I was listening to the Christian radio station (KLOVE). They played this song (Before the Morning--by Josh Wilson) that I swear was written just for us...and it has become my new favorite song. It has helped me remember why we suffer when we have a God that loves us.
We go back to the specialist on Monday (Jan. 31) so keep praying for our Junebug. I will update again next week...hopefully, sooner than I did this week. Thanks for everything that you have done! We love you guys!
We went to the specialist on Monday (Jan. 24) for an ultrasound to see if anything has changed in the baby's kidneys or amount of fluid. There really hadn't been any change that we and the doctor could tell, so we go back on Monday (Jan. 31) for another look. I was really disappointed to hear the doctor say that everything looked the same. I went into the appointment really hopeful (maybe too hopeful) that there would be fluid and the baby's kidneys would be working (even just one). So needless to say, I was upset when we left the hospital. I (like everyone else) had been praying constantly for God to work on our Junebug's kidneys...make them work...make there be fluid. And when there is no change, I asked God why He isn't anwering our prayers! Come on, God! You created this life...why are you doing this!?!
Well, my wonderful sis-in-love (Rett) wrote a beautiful post on their blog...and I think it helped answer my questions. :) Read it here...then come back to finish reading my post. :)
After I read it, the rest of this week has been pretty good. I just keep telling myself that maybe God's reason is ultimately for His glory. Our little Junebug, living in my body, is changing people...for the better!! People are talking to Him that haven't talked to Him in a while...or ever! Junebug is changing relationships with people...co-workers, friends, strangers, family...this baby is making people care about each other. Taking time out of their busy lives to talk to people and talk to God. God definitely has big plans for this little baby that has about 20 weeks to hang out inside of me.
Yesterday, on the way home from school/work, I was listening to the Christian radio station (KLOVE). They played this song (Before the Morning--by Josh Wilson) that I swear was written just for us...and it has become my new favorite song. It has helped me remember why we suffer when we have a God that loves us.
We go back to the specialist on Monday (Jan. 31) so keep praying for our Junebug. I will update again next week...hopefully, sooner than I did this week. Thanks for everything that you have done! We love you guys!
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Week 18
Well, here we are...halfway through week 18. I planned on updating this on Monday afternoon after we had our scheduled ultrasound to find out the gender of our Junebug. But that appointment didn't go as we thought it would...
We went to the OB at 2:30 ready for the ultrasound...ready to hear "It's a girl" or "It's a boy". The ultrasound tech was getting the baby's measurements even though it was all curled up in a ball. Feet by its head, and hand behind it's head...just relaxing. But from what she could tell everything looks good. The heartbeat was 160 bpm, the femur and head were measuring right, and it was moving around. She then told us there was not much amnionic fluid in there...and asked if I had noticed any leaking. No, I haven't...so she quickly stopped the ultrasound and took us to an exam room to wait for the OB. She came in and explained that there was hardly any fluid, which is concerning. She took us to the office next door (Maternal Fetal Medicine) so they can do a more in-depth ultrasound and figure out why there isn't fluid like there should be. At this point, Rob and I were both a mess....and I mean mess!! Something is wrong with our Junebug?!?! This isn't how the day was suppose to go!
We were at that Dr's office for about 2 hours...I had 2 ultrasounds (one by the tech and one by the dr). They determined that Junebug's kidneys aren't functioning like they should. See, from what we've been told, the kidneys filter blood and make urine, which the baby then excretes. The urine is what becomes the amnionic fluid. The baby breathes in the fluid and helps to develop the lungs. It all goes back to the kidneys...we need Junebug's kidneys to work!! Unfortunately, there is nothing medically that can be done. It's truly all in God's hands!
All of this was (and still is) a huge shock to us!! We had a lot of questions...so on Tuesday morning, I called the OB's office to see if we could meet with her. We went back in and were able to get most of our questions answered. We also met with Pastor Brad (a longtime friend and pastor of our wonderful church). He listened and prayed with us! We felt more at peace once we left his house.
Please pray with us that our Mighty God, the Ultimate Physician, will get little Junebug's kidneys working. He is capable of miracles.
God, you know that this is a miracle that this little baby is growing inside of me. We didn't think it was going to happen...but you made it happen! You have blessed us with Junebug...please continue to bless us! Please get little Junebug's kidneys working. We are being selfish and want Junebug to be here with us, happy and healthy! But we know You are in control of this situation. And even if this doesn't make sense in our simple human brains why things are going this way, we know that You have our best interest at heart. Your plan is always better than our own. We lean on You, God. You are more knowledgable and powerful than we are. Please continue to give Rob and I (along with our families and friends) strength and peace in this tough time. We need You to get through this. Amen.
Thank you to all of the family, friends, and people we don't know that are praying for us and our little baby. We are feeling it and I know God is hearing every prayer and thought! Please keep storming God's ears with prayers for Junebug.
To our Junebug:
We love you and can't wait to meet you. Know that there are lots of people praying for you that don't know Momma or Daddy...people love you already. :)
This video is a song we sing at church that has been playing in my head since Monday afternoon...
We went to the OB at 2:30 ready for the ultrasound...ready to hear "It's a girl" or "It's a boy". The ultrasound tech was getting the baby's measurements even though it was all curled up in a ball. Feet by its head, and hand behind it's head...just relaxing. But from what she could tell everything looks good. The heartbeat was 160 bpm, the femur and head were measuring right, and it was moving around. She then told us there was not much amnionic fluid in there...and asked if I had noticed any leaking. No, I haven't...so she quickly stopped the ultrasound and took us to an exam room to wait for the OB. She came in and explained that there was hardly any fluid, which is concerning. She took us to the office next door (Maternal Fetal Medicine) so they can do a more in-depth ultrasound and figure out why there isn't fluid like there should be. At this point, Rob and I were both a mess....and I mean mess!! Something is wrong with our Junebug?!?! This isn't how the day was suppose to go!
We were at that Dr's office for about 2 hours...I had 2 ultrasounds (one by the tech and one by the dr). They determined that Junebug's kidneys aren't functioning like they should. See, from what we've been told, the kidneys filter blood and make urine, which the baby then excretes. The urine is what becomes the amnionic fluid. The baby breathes in the fluid and helps to develop the lungs. It all goes back to the kidneys...we need Junebug's kidneys to work!! Unfortunately, there is nothing medically that can be done. It's truly all in God's hands!
All of this was (and still is) a huge shock to us!! We had a lot of questions...so on Tuesday morning, I called the OB's office to see if we could meet with her. We went back in and were able to get most of our questions answered. We also met with Pastor Brad (a longtime friend and pastor of our wonderful church). He listened and prayed with us! We felt more at peace once we left his house.
Please pray with us that our Mighty God, the Ultimate Physician, will get little Junebug's kidneys working. He is capable of miracles.
God, you know that this is a miracle that this little baby is growing inside of me. We didn't think it was going to happen...but you made it happen! You have blessed us with Junebug...please continue to bless us! Please get little Junebug's kidneys working. We are being selfish and want Junebug to be here with us, happy and healthy! But we know You are in control of this situation. And even if this doesn't make sense in our simple human brains why things are going this way, we know that You have our best interest at heart. Your plan is always better than our own. We lean on You, God. You are more knowledgable and powerful than we are. Please continue to give Rob and I (along with our families and friends) strength and peace in this tough time. We need You to get through this. Amen.
Thank you to all of the family, friends, and people we don't know that are praying for us and our little baby. We are feeling it and I know God is hearing every prayer and thought! Please keep storming God's ears with prayers for Junebug.
To our Junebug:
We love you and can't wait to meet you. Know that there are lots of people praying for you that don't know Momma or Daddy...people love you already. :)
This video is a song we sing at church that has been playing in my head since Monday afternoon...
Monday, January 10, 2011
Week 17
Junebug's "skeleton is changing from soft cartilage to bone, and the umbilical cord — his lifeline to the placenta — is growing stronger and thicker. Your baby weighs 5 ounces now (about as much as an onion), and he's around 5 inches long from head to bottom. He can move his joints, and his sweat glands are starting to develop." Junebug's little fingers and toes now feature one-of-a-kind prints.
How far along: 17 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: - 1.6 lbs. (from pre-pregnancy weight)
Maternity clothes: Dress pants for school...yet my jeans still fit. :)
Stretch marks: I don't think I have any yet!
Sleep: Getting enough...but getting up about every 3 hours to go to the restroom
Best moment this week: Having dinner with great friends 2 nights in a row :)
Movement: I think I feel the little flutters that is Junebug moving around
Food cravings: Spicy M*kesells chips (thanks to Rob...)
Gender: ??? (We find out on Jan. 17--as long as Junebug cooperates)
Labor Signs: None!
Belly Button in or out: In
What I miss: Being able to sleep on my belly and back
What I am looking forward to: Finding out if Junebug is a boy or a girl :)
Milestones: Bought some more maternity clothes...
Monday, January 3, 2011
Week 16
In the next few weeks, Junebug "will double his weight and add inches to his length. Right now, he's about the size of an avocado: 4 1/2 inches long (head to rump) and 3 1/2 ounces. His legs are much more developed, his head is more erect than it has been, and his eyes have moved closer to the front of his head. His ears are close to their final position, too. The patterning of his scalp has begun, though his locks aren't recognizable yet. He's even started growing toenails. And there's a lot happening inside as well. For example, his heart is now pumping about 25 quarts of blood each day, and this amount will continue to increase as your baby continues to develop."
How far along: 16 weeks
Total weight gain/loss: -2 lbs. (from pre-pregnancy weight)
Maternity clothes: Dress pants for school...yet my jeans still fit. :)
Stretch marks: I don't think I have any yet!
Sleep: Getting plenty...but getting up about every 3 hours to go to the restroom
Best moment this week: Celebrating New Years with friends, and realizing that this year (well, in 6 months) we are having a baby :)
Movement: As seen, Junebug's moving all around - I'm just not sure that I'm feeling it yet.
Food cravings: Nothing new...still mainly fruit and some more salty snacks (popcorn, chips, etc.)
Gender: ???
Labor Signs: None!
Belly Button in or out: In
What I miss: Eating Lunchables for lunch... :)
What I am looking forward to: Feeling Junebug move...or jab
Weekly Wisdom: Eat slower...I get too full too fast, then am starving like an hour or two later
Milestones: Buying maternity pants...
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